When I saw the question, “Do you ever smell a certain, familiar scent and suddenly remember a small part of your childhood you totally forgot about?” I knew instantly what it was…fresh mown grass.
Growing up in Michigan, I remember the smell of our freshly mown lawn on Saturday or Sunday summer afternoons. Once the yardwork was complete, Dad would come inside and watch the baseball game. This makes my memory multi-sensory, a combination of scent and sound.
The smell of freshly mown grass always takes me back to those summer afternoons, but it doesn’t feel complete without the sound of a baseball game playing on TV. Should I mention that this is an old-fashioned console TV that only receives four channels, has a TV antenna, and you had to walk over to the TV to change the channels or adjust the antenna? I know, I’m dating myself. That shows how far back this memory goes.
I don’t have any other scent-based memories that have such a substantial impact on me as freshly mowed grass. I will admit, if I hear a baseball game playing on TV, I miss the smell of grass. In my mind, they go together. What scent transports you back to your childhood? Share in the comments below.
One of the downfalls of living and traveling full-time in an RV is only seeing my grandchildren once a year. While planning my 2023 travels and time in Michigan, I find my mind reminiscing back to the fun I had last summer with my grandchildren, Austin, Corbin, and Alexandria.
My 2022 visit was a fast-moving nine-day visit. I decided that because of the difference in their ages and interests and not having much time with them, it would be fun to do a couple of things together in the nine days I was there. I also wanted special one-on-one time so each child got their own day.
I took the three of them to a small, local railroad museum. The museum was interesting but didn’t hold their attention for long, so I suggested ice cream. I was surprised to learn Corbin doesn’t like ice cream, so he got a pop to drink instead. I thought it was cool when an Amish horse and buggy came down the street as we ate our ice cream at a picnic table.
Austin and Alex on a railroad car outside the Clare Railroad Museum; Corbin and Alex view a display inside the museum
When I commented on the horse and buggy, Corbin (age 12) informed me that the Amish do not believe in modern technology. To them seeing this is common, everyday stuff. I realized how much when I was on my way back to my campground and saw a horse and carriage tied up to a hitching post in front of Dollar General.
Alexandria (Alex)
Alexandria was the first to go solo, and her bubbly, social butterfly 7-year-old personality is always fun to watch. She is a girly girl, and that shines through when shopping for clothes. We went to the dressing room with six outfits to try on, and I told her we would buy two for school. That was a fantasy in my mind but turned out not reality.
After the try-on session, there was nothing Alex couldn’t wear, so I asked her which she wanted. She said she needed the grey flowered fleece pants and top because they are soft and warm. The yellow-flowered dress and leggings are necessary because it is bright and sunny. The third dress and leggings she wanted because it was cute. Oh, and by the way, Grandma, I need shoes. We were at Kohls and did go to the shoe department, but they didn’t have any in her size.
Here’s a comical side note—Alex recently informed her mom that she needed new shoes because when she went shopping with me, I wouldn’t buy her any! It has been seven months since I took her shopping. She never said anything to me about not getting them. Still, my daughter’s comment has me clued in about not making any mistakes this time because they will not be forgotten!
Alex selected McDonald’s for lunch, and she talked continuously through the entire meal. I had to tell her to stop talking and eat so we could get to the museum. The Mid-Michigan Children’s Museum is a fun, hands-on museum for kids 10 and under and has eleven galleries created around the school curriculum.
Alex enjoying the dentistry exhibit and climbing wall at Mid-Michigan Children’s Museum
With everything from car driving, medical and dental areas, scientific activities, wall climbing, water activities, art center, large tinker toy building, play kitchen area, play farm area, and more, she was on the go constantly. She took home artwork she made and a toy from the gift shop. We were there for about four hours and closed the place down.
Austin
Austin was 16, so his school shopping was in the young men’s department. I and several other mothers and grandmothers hung around the doorway of the men’s fitting room, checking on how the clothing looked on the teens trying on clothes for school. Heaven help the adult male who wants to try things on during school shopping season.
Austin got a couple of outfits for school, then selected McDonald’s for lunch. He is quieter, so conversation is at a minimum with him. After lunch, we went to the Castle Museum of Saginaw County History.
Austin standing beside a sign outside the Castle Museum of Saginaw and viewing a display inside the museum
The museum has three levels of exhibits and displays, covering the Saginaw Sports Hall of Fame, lumbering, and automotive. There are some hands-on exhibits and many displays with informational cards to read. I’m sure there are things we missed or skimmed over when we were there. Their gift items are minimal, and Austin wasn’t interested in any of the items they had.
Corbin
Corbin, at age 12, loves astronomy, so I purchased tickets for a program at the Delta College Planetarium. We arrived a little early and explored the exhibits they had while waiting for the program to start. The program was interesting and designed for kids exploring space, but informative and interesting. The gift area had pencils and pencil toppers in an assortment of designs, so Corbin picked three sets for himself, then selected some for Austin and Alex.
After the program, we walked across the street to Wenonah Park, which displayed several flags. I was impressed that Corbin could list their origins; I didn’t know them. After spending a few minutes at the park, Corbin suggested we head to lunch—I guess he was hungry.
Corbin viewing display inside Delta College Planetarium and in front of the flag display at Wenonah Park
Corbin suggested Taco Bell, saying he thought I could use a break from McDonald’s. He was right, but I would have gladly gone if he suggested going there. As Corbin ate six cheese rollups, he got a huge thumbs up from me by saying, “People like us who aren’t fat can eat here.” I don’t meet the “not fat” classification, but it’s nice that Corbin views me that way.
After lunch, we went to Kohl’s, where we got him a couple of outfits for school. He was easy; he knew what he liked and wanted to wear. The only dispute was when they didn’t have a character shirt in the right size, and he tried to convince me one that fit like a second skin was fine. I told him there was no way I was buying it in that size and that he would need to find something else.
Saying Goodbye
Paul and I met my cousin and her husband in Cadillac for lunch. Another day my daughter, Caroline, accompanied us on a trip to Traverse City, where we visited my grandparent’s farm, which is now Market 72, a public venue for events. We then met my other cousin and uncle for lunch.
The above is the farm of my paternal grandparents, Louise and Dominick King, built by my great-grandfather in 1918 on M-72 in Traverse City. You see the front and back of the house, the view of the barns from the back porch, and Caroline standing under weeping willow trees between the sideyard and one of the farming fields.
As my time came to an end, Paul and I went to dinner at Texas Roadhouse with my daughter, son-in-law, and three kids. The dinner was over too quickly. It was the last time I would see them for another year. I was moving the RV downstate to stay in Port Huron before heading south to Arizona. I took a few family photos of them and departed with sadness.
Austin, Rob, Caroline, Corbin, and Alexandria
Blake’s Family Day
After I left the Clare area and was in Port Huron, Caroline called and asked if I would like to attend Family Day at Blakes’s Big Red Apple in Macomb. My son-in-law has been working the Halloween weekends there for several years, so they always attend the employee family day.
This was a fun outing, with a haunted hayride, a zombie paintball hayride (my son-in-law is a zombie), a 3-story haunted barn, a petting zoo, a pedal car track, and other activities. Of course, no trip to an apple orchard would be complete without purchasing apple cider, donuts, and caramel apples.
Alex leads the way, with Corbin and Austin following behind on the pedal vehicles. Corbin and Alex enjoy the bounce pads. Austin, Alexandria, and Corbin stand by the “How Tall This Fall?” display at Blake’s Big Red Apple.
And with that, my yearly visit with my grandchildren was officially over. Now I look forward to 2023 when I have booked a longer stay of six weeks in their area. I am looking forward to spending more time with them.
We all experience them from time-to-time. The twists and turns of life created by things we aren’t expecting or choices we make. It is what we make of them that determines our destiny and happiness.
My life was a whirlwind of twists and turns for several years, with the culmination being my decision to sell my home and the bulk of my possessions, leave my job prior to being of retirement age, and live and travel on the road full time in a motor home.
When I made that decision I knew I would need to find some type of remote work. I’m one of the lucky ones. I have a spousal pension from my deceased husband and some savings/investments to help me float through the beginning of this, but not enough to sustain me long-term. I plan to live a long time and my investments need to support me in old age! Income on the road is a must.
I have always loved writing, and one of my goals when I set off on this was to expand my writing career. When you travel throughout the United States and Canada, travel articles for magazines is a good possibility. The income generated from that is not steady enough to support this new lifestyle, and so I continued looking for part-time remote work.
I applied for and was accepted on a contractual basis to be part of a pool that writes ad-scripts for radio advertising. This is giving me some good experience, but is more of a pocket-change job than a lucrative career, so I continued looking.
I joined The Barefoot Writer, then signed up for a course on becoming a copywriter with American Writers and Artists, Inc. I had not even started the course when two days later I received a response to another contractual job I had applied for and have now accepted to write marketing blogs for various companies.
As part of a pool of copywriters I am obligated to complete five assignments per week. This includes research and writing a marketing blog that meets the clients specifications and the company’s QC requirements. I look at this as a wonderful opportunity to make money while that is compatible with the instruction I am getting from my copywriting course.
I’m sure the time spent learning to juggle work, class, travel, and photography in a time-efficient manner will leave me twisting and turning. Now, if you are a long-time reader of this blog you know that I am a photographer and sell my work on Fine Art America. I am also looking to expand my sales avenues for my photography, so add another matter to my juggling act.
I am starting off 2020 with a juggling numerous things that are the culmination of the twists and turns of my life. Here’s to what should be a very interesting year!
Please comment: What are the twists and turns you are juggling? What are your plans for 2020?
We all plan out our lives, whether it is the routine we use at work, getting the kids to bed and then up again for school, or what we will do on vacation, we all have a plan. What happens when that plan doesn’t work, or something happens that means those plans need to be changed? Do you get stressed or just “go with the flow?”
There are times when no matter how well you have activities planned, something will happen that throws a wrench into the pot — it can be job loss, car problems, an accident, a fire, natural disaster, or someone made a mistake.
In dealing with problems I have noticed there are those who get stressed, angered, frustrated, and do not cope well. There are others that may feel frustrated but seem to be more flexible, adapt where necessary, and continue on without experiencing much stress.
Why is it people are so diverse on how they cope with problems that arise in their life? Is it learned from when they were children observing their parents? Is it their natural personality? Is it something that happened in their lifetime that impacted their manner of handling stress?
In my opinion, it is all of these combined together to create a personality and coping ability that is unique to each person. A person’s everyday lifestyle, economic level, personal experiences, and childhood combine together and impact how each person will handle different challenges as they occur. The same challenge may be handled with ease by one person, but create immense stress in another. There is no right or wrong, it simply is.
A person who has always lived a financially strong life will likely find it difficult to handle a sudden loss of income that leaves them unable to purchase everything they need, much less want but don’t need. A person who grew up in a low income family or has spent the majority of their adult life with financial struggles would also find loss of income difficult, but they are more prepared mentally and emotionally to handle dealing with meager funds.
Someone who grew up in an environment where every minor problem was over-exaggerated into a major catastrophe will likely not have the coping mechanisms of someone who grew up in an “accidents will happen” and “life goes on” mindset. The first would teach you to always be on edge and the person will likely “fly off the handle” at bumps in the road, while the second is more likely roll with whatever life throws at them. While there is not a right or wrong personality, it is likely that the person with better coping mechanisms will have a less stressful life.
What about someone who has encountered war, been in a horrible accident, experienced death of a loved one, or been assaulted? There are uncountable incidents that could happen to a person which may have a profound effect on their way of thinking, what they fear, what angers them and how they react to various events. Those lifetime encounters impact their way of thinking, how they plan their life and how flexible they are.
Whatever your personality type and how well you cope with upsets to your daily or lifetime plans, keep in mind that the more flexible you are, the happier you will likely be. Stress is normal in life, and there will be times when the best laid plans are disrupted. Allowing those disruptions to create undue stress can make you more irritable and does nothing to resolve the problem. Stay calm, focus on the solution, and make adjustments where needed. Remember, flexibility does not always, but can, result in something better than you originally planned.
Hard to believe it has been seven weeks since I started my new lifestyle of living on the road full time in a motor home (a/k/a full-time RV). In that amount of time I have visited Ontario, Quebec, New Brunswick, Prince Edward Island and Nova Scotia, Canada and Bar Harbor/Acadia National Park, Maine in the United States.
One thing you have to do when living this way is be conservative, be flexible, and enjoy life. Sometimes things go well, and other times the best laid plans can be foiled. Highlights of my travels and learning curve:
The best laid plans can be foiled when you make a day trip three hours away only to discover that town’s power is out and all businesses (including museum you wanted to visit) are closed.
Pulling off for a quick lunch break takes more planning in a 35-foot motor home towing a vehicle than it does in a car.
Ottawa, Ontario is the capitol of Canada and is a very interesting city, but bring your walking shoes. There is one parking lot in the entire city and a lot of area to cover. If you take a double decker bus tour it is a great way to get around, but you may end up with a tour guide who has a strong French accent and is difficult to understand.
Canadians are very pro recycling The question in grocery stores is “Do you have your own bag?” not “paper or plastic?” Some stores charge you for use of their bags.
You can not stock up when items are on sale. There is no extra room beyond the refrigerator and pantry.
There is a large percentage of people in Canada who hang their laundry outside to dry….many on pulley-style clotheslines.
When living in an RV, laundry is a necessary evil that must be done in a laundromat (most campgrounds have them) every 2-3 weeks.
You can live in a house for years and never wave at your neighbors, but in a campground everyone waves at everyone else.
The architecture and culture of Quebec City, with its fortification wall, Citadelle, and French influence is like taking a step into another country.
When you travel full time you need down time. This is not a vacation, it is a lifestyle.
When you give up on the road signs being true and think you will never see a moose, one shows up on the side of the road and you do not have the camera ready.
No matter how many times you see them, the difference between high tide and low tide at the Bay of Fundy is amazing. This is where you see the world’s largest tides.
Getting your mail an average of once every four to six weeks takes planning so it arrives in a city where you plan to be at the appropriate time.
A GPS can be your best friend and your worst enemy. Our Trucker GPS in the RV took us down a road that had been re-done two years ago and no longer goes through — it is now a dead end. When towing you cannot back up because it damages the tow unit, so we had to disconnect the jeep, turn the RV around and then re-connect before we could continue. Of course it would have helped if Ellsworth, Maine had put up a “Dead-End” sign, as a woman on the road said it happens all the time and they have been after the city to do something.
In many spots what is promoted as a “scenic drive” is overgrown with nothing to see.
Convection oven cooking is not difficult, just different. The three burners on the stove-top is much harder to adjust to as it does not easily accommodate large pans.
I have not adjusted to the feel of the motor home when driving in high winds or uneven pavement. That one is going to take some time!
This is an awesome way to live and I’m glad I took the plunge and jumped in with both feet.
As time goes on I look forward to sharing more of my travel adventures with everyone.
I have reached the point of excitement. My new lifestyle will soon be moving from life in an RV in my local area to actual life on the road. I am now on my last two weeks of work, with the 16th of August being my final day. I am training someone to take my place at work, will soon have the closing date on my house, and once that is completed we will set off on our new lifestyle.
This past weekend Paul and I opened up the “basement” storage in the motor home and got the last boxes out of my car and into the RV. Not everything is sorted and organized the way we want, but I am at least officially in the motor home totally and completely. The next two weeks will be a whirlwind of finishing up things at work and training my replacement, a doctor’s appointment, turning in my lease vehicle, finishing up paperwork, listing the second home I own for sale, and closing on the home I was residing in. In someways the day when I can “hit the road” seems so far away, and yet so close. Time passes quickly when trying to get everything finished in the final moments.
We are now starting to plan the first leg of our travels, and it is exciting and a bit nerve wracking at the same time. I am semi-retiring prior to retirement age, so will need to do remote or seasonal work while on the road to supplement the spousal pension I receive. Until I have a steady income from remote or seasonal work I will be concerned about finances. That is just me.
At the same time, if I didn’t jump at this opportunity now to travel full-time I know I would regret it for years to come. You only live once, so might as well make the most of it. What are that chances that I will ever again run across the opportunity to live full time in a motor home traveling Canada and the United States with a person with whom I am compatible who is also a fellow photographer?
I hope this is a life style we can enjoy for several years. The opportunity to experience a variety of cultures and the diversity of nature as we travel cross country is something I am looking forward to. As I travel I plan to keep a journal about my travels. I enjoy freelance writing and hopefully you will see my writing and/or photographs not only in this blog, but also in published magazines and journals.
If you have any “must see” locations in Canada or the United States, please share.
Life has been in a bit of a turmoil, but good turmoil, for a while now. I spent several months sorting through my belongings in preparation for downsizing from an 1800 sq. foot home into an RV and having an estate sale to eliminate what I am not taking with me.
I joined Paul in the RV on the 23rd of April, and my estate sale was held May 16-19th. The weather that has been miserably cold and rainy was, for the most part, warm and sunny that weekend….except for a tornado warning the last couple hours of the sale. The sale was a success, and the company I had conducting the sale for me is getting the home cleaned out so the real estate company and finalize steps needed to list it for sale.
Preparing to put my home up for sale created a whirlwind of things to be handled. As it turned out, the home needed a new roof, which has been completed. I hired someone to mow the lawns, and despite the mush the rain has created in spots, he managed to complete the task at least twice. I have someone hired to clean out flower beds and shrubbery, but the weather has prevented that from being completed thus far. Some inside drywall repair and painting, carpet cleaning, and power washing the outside of the home and it should be ready to go on the market. Hopefully it will be a quick sale.
Moving into a 35-foot RV creates challenges when trying to finding places for everything. The kitchen, bathrooms and bedroom are pretty well organized now. I still have lots of boxes to go through and where to put items. The problem is, being a writer, a good portion of those boxes contain paperwork, and I am not sure if they will all be able to stay. Other items end up in unusual places. My bottles of wine are under the bed, shoes are in a drawer, and at this point the driver’s seat is holding a chess board, backgammon board, and some paperwork. The number of boxes that have been emptied is impressive.
One of the greatest challenges is realizing that there is not the pantry, refrigerator, or freezer space I was accustomed to having in my home. One weeks worth of groceries for two people creates a full refrigerator. Our pantry is full. Convection oven cooking is not difficult, just an adjustment. Living is a bit more simplified. There isn’t room for clutter.
My Memorial Day weekend is a time for more sorting and organizing. Whatever you do this weekend I hope it is fun and enjoyable.
Thanksgiving has become a day when people are encouraged to express their thanks for the good things in their lives. Quite often one will say they are thankful for their husband, children, and friends. Rarely do you hear anyone say they are thankful for where they are at financially or for their worldly possessions. That just seems inappropriate, cold, and self-centered. So then why do we allow those things to take priority in our day-to-day lives the rest of the year.
I stumbled across this quote from Oprah Winfrey, “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never ever have enough.”
We live in a society where people are always striving to acquire more materialistic possessions…a bigger house, better car, nicer clothes, participate in fine dining, the best of the best. Unfortunately there are also a lot of people who are unable to achieve those things. Families that struggle financially, working just to pay their bills without luxuries others take for granted. Are those people less happy than those who have everything? Not necessarily. In some ways they may be emotionally richer.
Your happiness in life is not a product of the wealth. It is of the relationships you have, the peace you feel in your life. If you are always striving to better yourself financially, working hard to purchase all the “things” you want, doing what it takes to prove you are an accomplished person, you may find yourself with a lot of possessions but not really happy. You will always be pushing for something bigger and better, striving for a fulfillment you can’t quite reach.
If you concentrate on enjoying the little things in life — the beauty of a sunrise or sunset, the perfection of a flower in bloom, the joy in a child’s laughter, the sound of the waves crashing on a shore, and personal connections to the people around you, that is when you will find yourself content. Those are the things that hold value far greater than anything you can purchase. They are what gives life meaning.
Be thankful for what you have, not what you can purchase. If you concentrate on materialistic things you will never be fulfilled. If you focus on what you do have, the things that money can not buy and realize their value, you will find contentment, and anything beyond that is a bonus.
Quotes have a way of making you think, of getting you to take a step back and analyze things. If you have been a reader of my blog for a while then you know that quotes frequently pop up as a topic for my blogs. When life is especially stressful applying the thoughts in this simple quote I found can bring peace to an overly processed world.
Watch a sunrise once a year…..there is something absolutely beautiful about getting out of bed and watching the sun peak over the horizon in the morning. This is especially true if you are near a body of water. It is a refreshingly positive way to start the day. Sunsets are beautiful as well, but if it has been a while since you’ve watched the sun rise, set the alarm and partake in the experience. Refreshing!
Put marshmallows in your hot chocolate……this seems so ordinary. So “take off the chill” normal happening in fall or winter. Then it occurred to me that as I got older I would make a cup of instant hot chocolate, but somewhere along the line I stopped dropping in the marshmallows. Forgo the whipped cream that has become commonplace, or worse the “naked” chocolate without any fattening additives, and go back to your youth. Enjoy a few marshmallows melting in your hot chocolate. Yummy!
Lie on your back and look at the stars…..remember being a child, laying on the ground and looking up at the stars, amazed at the pure beauty and wonder of them. What a peaceful way to enjoy the nighttime sky. So many of us live in the city hustle and bustle where there are always lights and we forget to look up at the beauty of the night sky. As you are walking into your house after dark take the time to look up and enjoy glimmer of the moon and stars above you. Heavenly!
Never buy a coffee table you can’t put your feet on…..being that I haven’t owned a coffee table in about thirty-seven years, I can’t say too much in this area. I think this message has more to do with being comfortable your own home. My parents always had a coffee table which held things like coasters, display pieces such as an antique photo viewer, or large coffee table books, but never a person’s feet! As I prepare to downsize and move I am considering re-purposing my mother’s Lane cedar chest (the old fashioned hope chest) into a coffee table. It would be convenient for storing afghans in the living room and could serve dual purpose as a coffee table. Of course having owned reclining couches for several years, the idea of a coffee table may be defunct if I continue with that type of furniture. At the same time the idea of a traditional couch with a table in front has its appeal. Comfy!
Never pass up a chance to jump on a trampoline…..to me this says experience life, be adventurous. While some of us may be able to climb onto and jump on a trampoline, others may not have the physical ability to do so. Don’t let small limitations hold you back from what you can do. Go forth and try new things, take risks. Live life to the fullest and never pass up the opportunity to try something new. Exhilarating!
Don’t overlook life’s small joys while searching for big ones…..this is something way too many of us do, especially when young and career oriented, which often overlaps with the time-filled days of raising children. We get our mind set on not just keeping up with, but also exceeding “the Jones’s,” and in doing so miss out on a lot of life’s simple pleasures. If you find yourself caught up in the rush-rush lifestyle a good way to rejuvenate is to take a walk with a child, or better yet spend an afternoon with one. They will take you on an adventure of all the things you have forgotten to enjoy. The pleasure of blowing bubbles, watching a butterfly, gathering stones from a beach, stomping in mud puddles, gathering fall leaves, the smell of flowers, the rustle of the wind in the trees, the joy of watching birds, or even playing with your shadow. Relaxing!
I hope each of you reading this will take the time to do not only these things, but others that will bring you peace of mind and relaxation from the every day stresses of life.
That is a line in a song I enjoy by Darius Rucker, just click here to hear it. I was listening to the song and it got me to thinking about how we all develop set patterns of life. We get up, go through the same routine during the day, go to bed, get up and repeat.
The song goes on to say “Yeah, let yourself go, follow that feeling, Maybe something new is what you’re needing, Like a real life, let your hair down, feel alive, When was the last time, you did something for the first time?”
Those are thoughts we should all put into action when our life is feeling a bit ho-hum. It can be something major or something minor. Just spice it up a bit to re-build your energy and enthusiasm for life.
In July I took a 10-day vacation when I flew to Alberta, Canada for the Calgary Stampede. While it is not the first vacation I have ever taken, nor the first international flight (I flew to Mexico with a school group in 1978), it was my first time in Alberta, Canada and my first time attending the Calgary Stampede. It was also the first true vacation I have taken since 2014.
I am currently in an active sort-of first time events project. I have started doing some preliminary scouting of homes. I am planning to downsize and packing and moving an entire home, not to mention selecting and purchasing a home entirely on my own will be a first. When you have always done things with others, doing them on your own the first time is a different experience.
So, when you hear the question, When was the last time, you did something for the first time? What is your answer? What is on your bucket list? Throw out some ideas….I may want to incorporate your ideas into my list.
I was recently reading a book written a while back and it made a reference to calling the time-of-day line. That got me thinking, how many things that used to be a normal part of our everyday life are no longer done?
Calling the Time-of-Day Line (for those of you too young to know what this is, it was a special phone number you could call to get the exact time when setting clocks, etc.
Getting up to walk over and answer the phone, then having to stand next to it for the entire conversation because it was mounted on the wall and had a phone cord.
Kids going to their friend’s house, ringing the doorbell and asking if their friend could come out to play. No one called their friends on the phone to arrange a get-together until they were teens.
Riding bikes or roller skating without a helmet on.
Going to the Drive-In (there are a few still in existence, but they are not common)
Getting up to turn on the TV, then again to change the channel, and then again to adjust the rabbit ears or antenna.
Reading TV Guide to find out what was on TV that week.
Getting up on Saturday morning to watch cartoons, because that was the only time they were on TV.
Carrying a checkbook with you at all times to pay for any items you didn’t have enough cash for….debit cards did not exist.
Paying all your bills by sitting and writing checks, then sending the payment through the mail. Most young people don’t even order checks anymore, and a lot of them do not carry cash, they use a debit card for everything.
Do research by going to the library and reading an encyclopedia
Take your rolls of film to the store to be processed.
Open up a paper map to look at when planning a journey or to figure out where you are — although paper maps still do exist.
If not at home and you needed to telephone someone you had to look for a payphone and then have the proper change to put in the phone to use it.
Pull into a gas station and wait for the attendant to come out and inquire as to how much gas you wanted, and while the gas was pumping the attendant would clean your windshield and check your oil.
Have CB Radios in cars to communicate with each other — this was a bit of a craze in the late 70’s….my handle was the Gumball.
I’m sure there are more things that I haven’t thought of. What do you remember doing in your everyday life that is no longer done?
How often we have a dream of something…a place to travel, an advancement in career, weight loss, or a lifestyle change. Often whatever that dream may be seems so far off in the distance that we feel it is unachievable. The problem is that we fail to create a plan of action. Without a plan the dream is impossible, because without action the reality of the dream will never be achieved.
Some people formulate plans in their head. Other people, like me, make lists and cross things off as accomplished. Some are able to just dive in and start working without a plan of action. Whatever works for you is fine, as long as it works. Too often when a task seems overwhelming it is easy to let it slide; even if you have the list you never act on it. Other times set-backs can throw us off balance or cause a backwards slide. When that happens get your footing and push forward.
I am dealing with dreams in various aspects of my life, and the reality is I have been slow in taking action, but every small step I make gives me a feeling of accomplishment and the desire to push forward….I just need to start doing it at a faster pace!
Each of my dreams deals with a different part of my life. Each has a different game plan. Each will be worked on and accomplished at different speeds, and some may need to be put on hold while I push to accomplish others. That is okay. Even putting some on hold can be part of the overall plan of action. The important part is to act on the plan.
So, what are my Dreams + Action = Reality goals?
Asset Control: This sounds strange, but I have inheritance money and/or assets that have not yet been distributed to me and I need to take whatever steps necessary so that all items are under my control. I also have property and a motor home that I want to sell and need to push stronger to get those sales accomplished. Once I have achieved those things, my asset control goal will be accomplished and I will be able to better fund my investments for a higher yield, which has a direct effect on my retirement funds.
Downsizing: I decided some time ago that I need to downsize, and I have talked about it quite a bit, but the “action” part has been slow in coming. This is most likely because it will be a tremendous change. I will have to get rid of an overwhelming amount of items accumulated over a 34 year marriage, sell move from my 4-bedroom colonial with the plan to purchase a 2-3 bedroom ranch-style condominium. I am finding the action part is both time consuming and somewhat emotional as I will need to part with numerous possessions. However, after cleaning out my parent’s home following their demise and having listened to several friends also go through the same thing, I realize that the majority of this stuff is not anything my kids are going to want and is just taking up space. This is my number one priority and the first “dream” I have to make a “reality”.
Retirement: Being a widow retirement can be very close, within the next three years, or in the distant future. My full-retirement age of 67 is still ten years away. My goal is to land somewhere in the middle, around age 62-63. I know I cannot afford to stay in this house once I retire, and so the push to downsize is a necessity as much as a desire. The sooner I downsize the faster I can save more money toward my retirement dreams and/or another dream.
Travel: There are a lot of places I have not been to but want to see, both in this country and others. While working I want to start taking short trips and seeing a bit of the country. Once I retire I want to be able to travel much more extensively. I am even debating whether I want to go ahead and fulfill a prior dream my deceased husband and I had…full time RV. A friend of mine just started on his adventure, and in helping him get ready to head out I felt the desire come back to hit the road myself. I have learned that there are a lot of women driving Class A motor homes and towing vehicles, living the full-time life all by themselves If they can do it, why can’t I. Time will tell.
Writing and Photography: These are both things I do now, but my life has been rather hectic the past few years and I do not have as much time for either of these areas as I would like. I hope that once I have downsized, and most definitely once retired, that I can devote a considerable amount of time to both of these areas. I have a book started that I plan to finish and other ideas bouncing around in my head for additional books.
As you read this you may have realized that my dreams are related to each other. I need financial control of all my assets to achieve my other goals financially. I need to complete the downsizing prior to retirement. I need to retire to obtain more time for writing, photography, and travel. Dreams + Action = Reality. I better get busy!
I hope that while reading this you have started to formulate dreams and plans for action in your head. What are your dreams? I would love to hear about them in the comment section below.
There was once a popular song by the Eagles, with the lyric “Life in the Fast Lane, surely make you lose your mind.” That is what my life has felt like these past few weeks. I finish a day or a weekend and wonder how it went by so fast. I never get as much completed as I want.
Sometimes when life is making you feel compressed you need to take a step back and relax. Trying to paddle faster when you feel as if you are sinking just wears out your energy and you drown. Taking a break can restore energy and prepare you for the next round of chaos.
I have had a whirlwind going around me due to a series of events in my life….a friend who has been staying with me for the past eight months is getting ready to leave on a new adventure of full-time RV life. My son, who was in prison for six years, came home on the 20th of March and is staying with me. I have come to the conclusion that I need to downsize and have to go through all of my belongings and determine what I am going to keep and what must go.
Each of these things in and of itself are good changes. Compiled into one they are overwhelming. I look around my house and the massive amount of things I must sort through and am not sure where to start. My son is helping, he has started working on the side of the basement that was my husband’s workshop. I have set a deadline for getting all of this completed, which in some ways increases the panic of how much must be done.
Even though my daughter and her children live in a separate house, the adjustment for all of us to my son coming home after so long has not been easy. My daughter is living in a home that my son once lived in. When he went to prison the belongings he had in that home had to be boxed up. Both my daughter and son have items in my house that have to be cleaned out. The sorting, cleaning, and relationship adjustments can be stressful.
Even though I am trying to slow down, I continue to live life in the fast lane. This week I ate dinner out four of the five work nights because of my schedule…writers meeting, shutterbug meeting, haircut, and shopping all done after work created the preference to dine out rather than in. Saturday I am on the road around the time I normally step out of the shower so I can attend a writer’s conference an hour from home. Sunday I’ll need to tackle household chores, and of course Monday it all starts again. Life in the fast lane, will surely make me lose my mind!
As we go through life we develop habits, a way of doing things. Some of them are our own, some of them are done to accommodate the likes/dislikes of those around us. As we cycle through life those things change.
We develop likes and dislikes, ways of doing things, and personality traits from our parents, grandparents, siblings, other relatives and friends as we are growing. Then we become adults and move away from those we have grown up with. Some move away to attend college, some branch out on their own, living the single life, and others, like me, leave their parent’s home when they marry. Each of those different events will impact the individual person and their overall personality.
I grew up in a small town far away from distant relatives, I left my parent’s home when I married just before my 21st birthday. With my marriage I moved about two hours away from home. The person I married was not controlling, but he was nine years older and had far more life experiences than I. He had served overseas in the military, been married and had a child, and purchased a home. Looking back I adapted to his way of doing things more-so than he adapted to mine. He paid the bills, serviced the cars, did home repairs, and was the driving force in any major purchases. I was more willing to keep things as they were, to more or less “make do” with what we already had. That is how we lived for 34 years until he passed away in December 2015.
When he passed away I was living on my own for the first time in my life. I spent a couple years in a bit of a vacuum, going through the motions of life without really experiencing it to its fullest. I learned to do things I had never done before, such as yard work, getting cars serviced, and paying bills. You could say in that way I grew during that period of time, but I didn’t really evolve, I simply functioned.
With the help of a friend I began to re-evaluate where I was at and what changes I needed to make. I took a good look at the investments I had, and the company my husband had us with was not making me any money, in fact after paying the service charges I had lost money over the course of the two years since his death. I’m not a math person, but I’m not stupid. I needed a new financial advisor and I followed the recommendation of a friend and made a change. It has been a good one and I feel my financial future has a more positive outlook.
In looking at my investments I also took a good look at my living expenses v. income and realized that while I am making my bills with the assistance of my husband’s life insurance, I can not really consider that “living in the green.” Let’s face it, the life insurance savings won’t last forever, and living month-to-month is not the way I want to spend my retirement. I also realized that I can not retire and continue to live where I am at. The decision, I need to downsize. Now there is a lot of stuff in this house that I must sort, decide what to keep, what to toss, and what to sell. That will take some time. I would like to be out in six months, a year is more realistic, and it may take beyond that. However the longer it takes the more money I am spending on this house that I could be saving or using for more fun things.
Fun things. I am going to do some fun things this year. For the first time in about three years I am going to take a real vacation. I have to admit, once I made the commitment, put down the deposit and booked my airline flights I had some difficulty sleeping for a couple nights, but now I am looking forward to it. My first international flight on my own, I will be flying to Calgary, Alberta, Canada for the Calgary Stampede and spending 11 days out there. I have a friend who will meet me in Calgary. We will be staying in his motor home and taking in some of the scenic sights of the area, doing photography in addition to attending the Stampede. It should be an awesome trip and I am looking forward to it.
I have a girl’s weekend planned in Mackinac City. The weekend is a yearly event with my sister and two cousins, and we always change locations to keep it interesting. There is also the possibility of another weekend trip into Canada with a friend, but that one is only tentative at this point.
So, where am I in the cycle of life? I am in a growing stage. I have broken free of the “me” that I was when married and becoming the “me” that I am as a widow. I have started to walk around my house doing a visual inventory. “That was him, it goes.” “That is me, it stays.” Sometimes it is “That was us” and with those items, some will stay and some will go. When I move out of this house it will be a good, clean break and I will be continuing the ride as I cycle through life.
Life gets busy and we tend to let time move past without really analyzing where we are in life compared with where we want to be. It is when we take the time to step back and re-evaluate our position that we are able to determine our next step in accomplishing our overall goals. This applies to anything in life…employment, relationships, finances, hobbies, etc.
For the past twenty months since my husband passed away I spent time reducing some of my expenditures, rolling over investments without really paying attention to them, and learning to pay bills. I initially developed a budget but I did it without a clear understanding of my overall financial situation. I realized I wasn’t in the best of situations, yet allowed myself to float along for a while.
One to two months ago I started taking a harder look at my budget, my overall financial standing, and where I am compared with where I want to be at retirement. The process while a bit stressful was also very enlightening. I enlisted the assistance of a trusted friend in reviewing what I had to see if my thought process was on track and solicited suggestions. The realization was that I need to make some changes, and I need to make them faster than I originally thought in order to secure a better future for myself.
While parts of the decision making put pressure on me to accomplish some tasks faster than I originally anticipated, the completion of those things will put me in a better position both financially and mentally to move forward with my life. The decisions to make major changes in ones life are not easy, but they can also be enlightening. While there will be difficulties along the way, and some of my decisions will also impact others, once the dust settles down things should be better for me and others.
So what am I doing? I am going to downsize by sorting my belongings and accumulations of the past 36 years into keep and sell piles, and I am going to downsize out of my home and into something smaller and more manageable for me, both in upkeep and cost. I am changing financial advisors in the anticipation that my investments will provide me with better earnings for my retirement. I am going to forgo some of my activities and/or volunteer positions so that I have less commitments and more time to devote to things that I need or want to accomplish, such as the downsizing, running my photography business, and my writing.
Life is always evolving, always changing. If you have areas you believe need improvement or with which you are unhappy, take a hard look at things and make changes that will provide you with the lifestyle and overall happiness you deserve.
The thought below struck me as being important when I first saw it as it carries a lot of meaning. So many people spend time making big issues out of small things. Way too much time is spent stressed over things that a few months from now won’t even matter.
We have 86,400 seconds per day to spend either happy and positive or negative and stressed. So often people who are having a bad day take it out on those around them, and in the process ruin the other person’s day as well.
We all have those occasional days where one thing goes wrong, then something else goes wrong, and before you know it you have had an entire day of things going wrong. Have you ever considered your attitude when this is happening? Do you laugh it off and keep going or do you get frustrated, stressed out, angry, and rude?
Taking control of your attitude in moments of stress has a huge impact on your own personal happiness. Don’t allow the behavior of others to impact your mood; and more importantly don’t let your behavior have a negative impact on others.
One prime example is in this era of social media is people who feel the need to post their personal arguments for public scrutiny. What is this accomplishing? Sympathy from others who are not involved? Quite often I will read posts and wonder why someone felt the need to post something. Have they considered the emotional harm to the person they are complaining about, who is most likely a friend, spouse, or other family member? Have they forgotten that once on public media it is never lost and can re-surface at any time? When posting on social media give consideration to the positive v. negative impact your posting may have, especially on those who you are closest to, those who deserve your love and protection, not public criticism.
As you go through your week remember that when life gives you a bowl of pits instead of cherries, when your parade gets rained on, or when a hurricane blows through you life, to keep a positive attitude and laugh at the blunders. Search for the positive in the negative and move on. Chances are 12 months from now you won’t remember it happened. Don’t sweat the small stuff, live is bigger than that.
Life is fun — the things you take in stride, the things that flip you out. Sometimes neither make sense which is what keeps life hopping with laughs — the weird idiosyncrasies of each an every personality that make it unique.
I am like most females, I like cute little things like kittens and bunny rabbits. I have learned to tolerate spiders on my front porch, but anywhere else I want them demolished. I don’t freak out over most rodents, but I am reasonably cautious and don’t want them invading territory they shouldn’t.
That leads me to my Sunday encounters. I went outside to mow the lawn. I was putting gas in the rider, which is backed up to my house. Suddenly there is this flash of movement from the area behind the mower. Something jumps out and naturally I jump with it.
Now you have to admit, when you are not expecting it those cotton-tailed bunny rabbits can be pretty ferocious looking when they are scampering out from a hidden spot and making a mad-dash across your lawn. Once I realized what it was I decided it was safe to proceed with my plan of mowing the lawn. I am here to tell about it, no further attacks.
I was riding the mower along a fence line where the ground angles, so you have to stay close and battle any tree or bush limbs hanging over. As I am traversing the path I apparently disturbed a black hornet or wasp (I can’t tell the difference) and he was flying around and at me. I do not like those creatures, they are not nice! To keep him away I automatically swatted at him, which I had to do twice before he finally left. Then the mind does weird things…what if he goes to get his friends and gangs up on me? What can I say, I grew up when all the “killer bee” movies were out. Luckily I didn’t have to relive any movies, he stayed away.
So I turn the corner in the front yard and bump! I drive through a weird depression or hole that hasn’t been there before. I have no idea what it was, and I did not get off to inspect, but of course I wondered…was it from a snake, a gofer, a mole? Who knows. I’m not going to ponder the possibility. Hmmmm, could that be the reason I decided not to rake this week?
So now that I’ve been blasted by bunnies, hassled by hornets and bungled by bumps the rest of the week should be a breeze. What other creatures could possibly invade my personal space? A spider.
I was driving my car down the road and get a glimpse of something. It was a very tiny, microscopic spider strolling along the inside of my windshield. Now I must say that compared to the ones that typically live on my front porch, this one was so tiny it almost isn’t worth mentioning. However I feel the need to point out that not only did I not flip out, but I just shrugged my shoulders and went “oh well” and let him enjoy his stroll. Attempting to kill a spider when driving down the road is probably not recommended. As I am writing this I do have one thought though. I let him remain inside my car….what if he grows? That is a thought I do not want. Hopefully it gets hot and he dies of heat exhaustion before that happens.
So as you are going through your day and encountering the various creatures of the wild, laugh at your own goofy, stupid, exuberant reactions to things and let the good times roll.
If you have been a reader for a while you know that I like quotes and sometimes use them as inspiration for my writing. I stumbled upon the quote Self-help and in reading realized how well it fits me.
How to stop time: kiss. This one shouldn’t need an explanation. Lets just put it bluntly, kissing is a huge turn-on. It can make time stand still or make it spin. It is relaxing, comforting, exhilarating, exciting, enticing, enjoyable. One of the best feel-good things there is. Enjoy!
How to travel in time: read. Reading is a wonderful way to escape from the world. Pick a subject, dive into a book and loose yourself as you travel to another world. By selection of topic you can go anywhere, into the past, into the future, travel in outer space, get lost solving a crime or be entranced by romance. The world is yours and the choice is yours on where in time you travel. Pick a destination and explore.
How to escape time: music. Music has the ability to make you feel good and get the body moving. It is energizing and relaxing, happy, and sad. It can wake you up; it can put you to sleep. It can create elicit memories of the past or help you dream of possibilities for the future. There are no rules. All you have to do is feel…enjoy the beat, sway to the rhythm, let the mind wander, escape reality, let the music flow as you escape in time.
How to feel time: write. I think this one is mis-labeled. I don’t feel time when I write so much as I lose time, or rather loose track of time. Anyone who is a writer, who truly enjoys writing, knows the feeling of becoming absorbed in their writing and not wanting to stop until all those thoughts that are in their brain course down through their arms, into their fingertips and onto paper. Those thoughts must be put down and preserved. If you want to lose time, write.
How to release time: breathe. How true this is, and how very important it is to understand. You release time when you breathe. When you breathe you release stress, refocus, re-energize, maintain balance. You let time fade away and you regain your life. To have a balanced, enjoyable life you have to allow yourself to breath and release time.
The answer to self-help is time. Time to enjoy all the aspects of life. Time to escape all the stress of life. Time to be whatever you want to be. Read something that exhilarates the mind. Kiss with tenderness; kiss with passion. Grab someone and sway to the music. Breathe. Relax. Enjoy. Then put all those memories on paper.
We all have a vision of how our life will be, who will be a part of our journey, our plans and dreams for the future. Sometimes that plan goes untested. Sometimes it has twists and turns, and those can lead to the ultimate crash.
When you crash you have two options — Crash and Burn or Crash and Climb. If you crash and burn you have allowed circumstances to take control of your life. Instead you need to crash and climb out of the rubble, rebuilding your life. Remap your life, make new plans and dreams. Great things can happen that would never have occurred before you hit that wall.
During the climb you will learn new skills, new relationships will form. People will enter your life and impact you in ways you never before imagined. They may influence the way you conduct business, handle finances, travel, view life, invade your mind or leave a mark on your heart.
I hit a brick wall fourteen months ago when my husband lost his battle with cancer. I have spent the past year climbing out of the rubble and rebuilding my life. A good friend has knowingly or unknowingly guided me in the process. They have pushed me beyond my comfort zone, asked questions to inspire my thought process. Not judgmental, but thought provoking inquiries such as “How do you plan to do that?” and “What are your plans for the future?”
I am happy with my life. It isn’t what I originally planned, but that is okay. I have climbed out of the rubble and embraced the change. I have done things I never would have done prior to the crash. I have developed friendships I never would have made before I hit that wall.
No matter how good life was before the crash, embrace the change. Value the friendships. Enjoy the journey. Believe that the best is yet to come.
I am a lover of quotes and sayings. When I stumbled across one on open-minded people I snatched it up immediately. It is so true in its most basic form. How do people become open-minded? Are they born that way? Is it the way in which they were raised? What makes one person open-minded and another close-minded?
I actually believe it is a combination of all those factors. Some people are born or develop a belief that everything that happens for a reason and are accepting of that. They view life as a fun experience. They are willing to try new things, to listen to the opinion of others with respect, even if they have a differing viewpoint. They are accepting of others and let most of life’s ups and downs roll off their shoulders. Those are open-minded people. They are accepting and kind.
Then there are those people who try to impose their beliefs on others. They are disagreeable with anyone who shares a different opinion. They are right and others are wrong. They judge, criticize and try to change those around them. Those are close-minded people. It is there way or the highway.
Are you open-minded or close-minded? Evaluate yourself honestly. If you are by nature an open-minded person, congratulations. If you tend to be more close-minded try to open up your viewpoints, accept the opinion of others, relax, enjoy life.
Why? What difference does it make? A lot. A positive attitude reflects upon others and their reactions to you. It also reflects upon you and the kind of person you are. Try to put forth a positive, accepting attitude. When you do, positive things will happen.
When I was starting this blog I struggled with a theme. Most people stick to one particular topic in their blogs, but I like to write about a variety of things because I am involved in a wide range of things in my daily life. That is when it hit me, my life is a melting pot of activities and that would be the topic and theme of my blog. LIFE IS A MELTING POT covers anything and everything. My activities as a photographer, our families involvement with CPS/DHS, travel, genealogy, family events, work, or any other topic that I feel is worthy of comment. I hope you enjoy the blog, comment often, and become a follower/subscriber.
I am dealing with dreams in various aspects of my life, and the reality is I have been slow in taking action, but every small step I make gives me a feeling of accomplishment and the desire to push forward….I just need to start doing it at a faster pace!
In looking at my investments I also took a good look at my living expenses v. income and realized that while I am making my bills with the assistance of my husband’s life insurance, I can not really consider that “living in the green.” Let’s face it, the life insurance savings won’t last forever, and living month-to-month is not the way I want to spend my retirement. I also realized that I can not retire and continue to live where I am at. The decision, I need to downsize. Now there is a lot of stuff in this house that I must sort, decide what to keep, what to toss, and what to sell. That will take some time. I would like to be out in six months, a year is more realistic, and it may take beyond that. However the longer it takes the more money I am spending on this house that I could be saving or using for more fun things.
So what am I doing? I am going to downsize by sorting my belongings and accumulations of the past 36 years into keep and sell piles, and I am going to downsize out of my home and into something smaller and more manageable for me, both in upkeep and cost. I am changing financial advisors in the anticipation that my investments will provide me with better earnings for my retirement. I am going to forgo some of my activities and/or volunteer positions so that I have less commitments and more time to devote to things that I need or want to accomplish, such as the downsizing, running my photography business, and my writing.
people I snatched it up immediately. It is so true in its most basic form. How do people become open-minded? Are they born that way? Is it the way in which they were raised? What makes one person open-minded and another close-minded?
--- LIFE IS A MELTING POT --- Grace Grogan...Writer, Photographer 